Tag: Spirituality

Deconstruction and Reconstruction: Questioning the Faith

scribblingtheology7 Comments

This is the sixth and final part in a series on apologetics that I’ve written with my friend Doug Espie over at Bride and World. To view earlier articles in the series, click on the following links

Part I: What is Apologetics?

Part II: People and Apologetics

Part III: Christianity and the Questions of Right and Wrong

Part IV: Reflections on Why the Biblical Story Makes Sense

Part V: The Historical Evidence for Christianity

and this is Part VI on Deconstruction and Reconstruction. Enjoy!

Deconstruction is the scary and sometimes liberating process of taking apart traditional theological ideas and seeing if they hold up under scrutiny. Reconstruction is the reformation of those ideas, and where they end up are sometimes different and sometimes the same. For me, a big de-reconstruction was around the age of Earth and debates on Genesis 1-2. When I first became a Christian, I was told by many people around me that the Earth was roughly 6000 years old. Genesis 1-2 was a proof text that God created the universe out of nothing in 6 literal days, with a literal Adam and Eve being our first two parents and that no one else existed until they had Cain and Abel. I attended seminars and was taught that evolution was one of the biggest enemies that the Church faced. We had to protect the Church and future generations from this scientific and biblically false worldview. There were nights during street evangelism where I would spend hours debating atheists, agnostics, and people with an evolutionary/Darwinian worldview believing that if I could poke holes in their arguments just enough, it’d save them from Hell. Unfortunately, in my time during those arguments, I never succeeded in converting anyone to Christianity. I went home week after week feeling deflated and frustrated that these people couldn’t see the world as I could. Eventually, I stopped debating with atheists and others from outside of the Faith. Instead, I endeavoured to learn more deeply about my own, to grow in wisdom and knowledge so that I could know more about the God I claimed to worship, myself, and the world around me.

In 2014 I entered into the wonderful world of biblical studies. I knew right away that my experiences at bible college would profoundly affect me in ways I wouldn’t even anticipate. My academic and spiritual mentors, coupled with other influences like the Bible Project (and books I was reading and podcasts I was listening to), unravelled an entirely new world of thought and personal development that I thirsted for. It was scholars such as Tim Mackie, John Walton, Tremper Longman III, John H. Sailhamer, Walter Brueggemann, J. Richard Middleton and even classic giants like Augustine of Hippo made me realise that Genesis 1-2 wasn’t so cut and dry as I had once been taught. Some of these scholars were evolutionary creationists (or theistic evolutionists) and trusted in mainstream science. Organisations such as Biologos facilitated collaboration with these faithful biblical scholars and Christian evolutionary scientists. Needless to say, my world was turned upside-down. Slowly, reluctantly, but surely, I began to embrace that a faithful reading of Genesis 1-2 didn’t need to be at odds with anything mainstream science advocated for. All in all, I fell head over heels in love with Genesis and after much wrestling, reading and praying, I finally settled on two things. 1. Genesis 1-2 isn’t a scientific retelling of the material origins of the universe. Instead it’s a theological narrative that makes sense of the purpose and meaning of the world the author was in. 2. Eventually, and even somewhat unwittingly, I became convinced that evolution made the most sense of the scientific data.

It’s a little strange for some; I suppose to end a series on apologetics by seemingly advocating for evolution. To be clear, I’m not. Evolution may come and go, and I’m definitely not a scientist. My point in this is that there are good deconstruction stories out there. Just because someone takes a different position on these ideas doesn’t mean they’ve abandoned the Faith. Yes, some do. Too often, we hear stories of once faithful Christians rejecting the Faith and even ferociously attacking it. These stories break my heart. My experiences with deconstruction (and I’ve had a few) have only deepened my faith and love for God. I would eventually become committed to reconstruction rather than letting the doubts and questions destroy everything I loved and held dear. Deconstruction can be a friend to the Christian, not a scary foe. During your time with serious apologetics, many questions that might challenge your faith will come your way. So here are some of my suggestions around dealing with deconstruction.

  1. Embrace the doubt. Don’t run away from doubt or use it to fuel some crusade against any particular brand or tradition of Christianity. List down your questions, and make sure they’re logical and concise. It is essential to know what it is you’re wrestling with and deconstructing. Don’t let abstract feelings and ideas cloud what it really is you’re wanting answers to. Do you struggle with the idea that people will burn for eternity in Hell if they reject Jesus? Great! List it down. Let the question sit with you. Don’t let your emotions around the idea (many of which may be valid) lead you to dismiss anything before seriously considering it.
  2. Research! Read widely and deeply. Listen to podcasts. Go to a bible college or seminary. Books are your friends. Don’t just Google it and find a random blog on the idea by some theological hack (ironic, I know). Go to reputable sources on both sides of the debate and weigh them. Give them time to work through you. A single question might take months or years to properly work through. That’s ok.
  3. Meditate on the Word. The Scriptures are the foundation for everything. It’s how we know who God is and what the Gospel is. “Blessed is the one who… delights in the law (teachings) of Yahweh. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither…” (Psalm 1). You may have questions about the Bible, about how to interpret it, about its validity. Good! You probably wouldn’t be human if you didn’t at some point. The Bible is meant to be wrestled with throughout your whole life. So sit with it. Let your questions bounce off the Scriptures and give it time to work. God is not afraid of your questions.
  4. So pray. I’m not very good at prayer. There’s something about talking into the air that feels unnatural to me. Nevertheless, some of the sweetest times of prayer I’ve ever had have been me looking back at when I felt God wasn’t there, but in hindsight, I saw Him working even when I couldn’t at the time. Suffering, pain, and brokenness often cloud our experiences of God (I’d also say so can joy and excitement). Yet, often they are the times when God does His best work.
  5. Time. I can’t stress this enough, time is your friend here. It can be very tempting to allow your frustrations and angst to get the better of you. “Idiots! how can they not see what I see? are they blind?” Probably, but you could be too. The best advice is, to be honest with yourself, allow the questions to sit with you, and let God do His work. Treat everyone around you as though God is using them to teach you. Slowly, with grace and love, ask questions with those around you whom you can trust. Go to your pastor and let God use the church to sanctify you (that’s its job, after all). Don’t have a point to prove or an agenda but let time do its thing. Let this be a season of growing in wisdom rather than a season of growing in bitterness and rejection of the beauty of the Gospel.
  6. Friends and pastors, chill out! In my experience, the most isolating experience in the world is having those who love you, the church God has called to grow you, push you away because you’re asking a few scary questions. The absolute worst thing you can do is dismiss and reject the deconstructing person. The church should be the safest place for these things to occur, not the enemy (as it is often perceived). These doubts and questions don’t happen in just a rebellious vacuum of heresy. They’re real people with genuine reasons and stories behind these burning doubts that they’re wrestling with.
  7. Commit to reconstructing. Pushing through the doubt (that never really leaves you – that’s fine) and reconstructing will, and I promise you this, leave you with a more robust and deeper faith than you ever had. It might take some time for you to get here. That’s to be expected. I can say without a doubt that I am more Christian than I have ever been on this side of my experiences, and I thank God for every one of them.

Apologetics is about defending the Faith and giving good reasons why we believe what we believe. One cannot defend a Faith that they haven’t genuinely wrestled with themselves. For those of us who wrestle harder then others, it’s my prayer that your deconstruction would be fruitful and Spirit led.

A faith without some doubts is like a human body with no antibodies in it. People who blithely go through life too busy or indifferent to ask the hard questions about why they believe as they do will find themselves defenseless against either the experience of tragedy or the probing questions of a smart skeptic. A person’s faith can collapse almost overnight if she failed over the years to listen patiently to her own doubts, which should only be discarded after long reflection.

– Tim Keller

Where are You Lord?

scribblingtheology1 Comment

How long O’ Lord


How long must I wait?


What are you trying to teach me?


What are you trying to say?


What are you, Lord?


I cannot see you.


Are you in the green grass?


The mountain air?


A lover’s embrace?


Emptiness and pain are often louder than Your words,


Uncertainty and loss blind me to Your presence.


Yet, there is a stirring inside of me,


a flicker, a lump of coal, smouldering – gently within.


Tenderly blow upon these embers and awaken this old and dying heart.


Breath from Your nostrils – life.


Where are You, O’ Lord?

Reflections on Why the Biblical Story Makes the Most Sense

scribblingtheology4 Comments

This is part IV in a series on apologetics. If you want to read the other articles click on the following links:

Part I What is Apologetics?
Part II People and Apologetics
Part III Christianity and the Questions of Right and Wrong

Enjoy!

“The value of the myth is that it takes all the things we know and restores to them the rich significance which has been hidden by ‘the veil of familiarity.’ The child enjoys his cold meat, otherwise dull to him, by pretending it is buffalo, just killed with his own bow and arrow. And the child is wise. The real meat comes back to him more savory for having been dipped in a story…by putting bread, gold, horse, apple, or the very roads into a myth, we do not retreat from reality: we rediscover it.”

― C.S. Lewis, On Stories: And Other Essays on Literature

Life is full of myth, lore, and drama that ensnares the imagination and catches us up within the rich tapestry that makes up our human story – that makes sense of our existence. Every one of us has this deep sense of our life, meaning more than it does, from the Sun rising in the East to the birds singing in the early morning. From the kettle boiling, our stomachs rumbling, the caress of a brisk winter wind, or the smell of saltwater in the Summer. The high pitched cry of a newborn baby and the roof of your mouth burning after taking a bite from a slice of hot pepperoni pizza. The gutted feeling you get over betrayal or the stress of paying your bills on time. The weariness one feels after a long day at work or looking after the family. For some, depression, for others, worse. Finally, the contentment (or excitement) of being in the arms of a lover – these are all paragraphs in the chapters to the book that makes up our existence.

The greatest stories ever written are told so that humanity can make sense of themselves. So that we can all slowly stitch together those chaotic, beautiful and terrifying chapters that we’ve all starred in. The world’s oldest stories, from the Enuma Elis (The Epic of Gilgamesh), The Hermopolis Egyptian creation myth, and The Eridu Genesis, to the Aboriginal dream-time stories and the Native American Creation myths, every culture and civilization has within their memory a story that defines who they are and why they’re here. For the modern West, we look to science and western philosophy to make sense of our humanity. According to evolutionary biologists, humanity (Homo sapiens) evolved from Homo heidelbergensis somewhere around 100 000 years ago. All life (a biologist might argue) evolved from the big bang event approximately 13.7 million years ago, and humanity is the latest in the evolutionary chain (that we know of). In light of this, philosophers like Fredrick Nietzsche and scientists in the neo atheist movement such as Richard Dawkins, and socio-political critics such a Christopher Hitchens might argue that life has no intrinsic meaning or value (this is called existential Nihilism). As Dawkins famously said, “the universe we observe is precisely what we should expect if there is, at bottom, no design, no purpose, no evil, no good, nothing but blind, pitiless indifference.” However, for most of us, this bleak commentary on the nature of existence remains unsatisfactory. Most of us, perhaps even Dawkins himself (though he might never admit it), have a deep-seated sense of “something more.” One cannot look at oneself in the mirror of the cosmos and not have their heart leap as it longingly grasps for something greater than themselves. We want to be known, we want to be loved, but we must first know ourselves and our place.

Herein lies the power of the biblical story (i.e. the Gospel – the Good News). The unfolding drama of the biblical story compellingly peels back the lays of the human existence and uniquely relates them to God, to one another, and the world in a way no other story does. Why is this story significant? Because of the way we live, relate to one another, and the world around us, the way we relate to God profoundly depends on how we comprehend, perceive and understand all of these things; otherwise, Nihilism may be true. Let us then explore this narrative so that we may judge for ourselves how this story makes sense of our existence.

  • God gives meaning and purpose to all that exists and orders it out of a chaotic state (Genesis 1:1-25)
  • Humanity is endowed with God’s image (Genesis 1:26), and they’re tasked to multiply and subdue the earth (Genesis 1:27-28)
  • This image that God gives humanity is two things. It is 1. an ontological reality (a part of their nature) in which every human somehow shares in, participates, and retains something of God (separate but related to His likeness). 2. It is a task or vocation that God bestows upon humanity to live out this ontological reality. That task is to multiply, subdue the earth, and guard and keep the Garden (Genesis 2:15), the dwelling place of God.
  • Humanity fails at walking in God’s image. Instead of guarding the Garden, Adam and Eve allowed the serpent to enter God’s dwelling place and corrupt it. Adam and Eve, therefore, chose for themselves wisdom apart from God and decided to rule themselves apart from God’s love and wisdom (Genesis 3).
  • God takes Adam and Eve and removes them from His dwelling place, stopping them from eating from the Tree of Life. Humanity has now chosen spiritual death and disunity with God, and as a result, they are disconnected from one another and the creation around them.
  • However, God doesn’t let the world fall into chaos. He promises that through the line of Eve, humanity will be saved by crushing the serpents head even at the risk of the seed’s own life (Genesis 3:15).

In just the first three chapters of the Bible, we have a densely rich narrative that paints humanities reality. We were created and chosen by God for good things. For unity, for love, peace and joy. Yet we went our own way. From Genesis 3:15 onwards, the entire Bible is story after story of God rescuing the world through chosen individuals and people groups, eventually culminating in the person and work of Jesus Christ (1 Corinthians 15:3-8). In the final pages of the Bible, the Apostle John tells of a world where through Jesus the Messiah, there will be no sickness or death. There will be no separation from God, life, each other, and the world around us (Revelation 24).

At the end of the day, it is up to the individual to decide which stories they want to believe in, and which they don’t. The Bible is a big book, and it isn’t something that’s supposed to be read and understood in a day, week, or even a year. It’s complex, gritty, raw, alien, but all too familiar at the same time. I believe, if we wrestle with every page and let the Scriptures speak for themselves, this metanarrative we call the Bible makes the most sense of who we are (image bearers made to be in relationship with God, one another, and the created world), where we are (in an unjust fallen world that we all contribute to), and where we’re going (new creation free from the tyranny of sin and death). My invitation to you is to consider its message carefully, reflect, and ask yourself this critical question “does this make sense of our story?” Whether you realise it or not, you’re a character in its unfolding drama.

How will your chapter end?

The Deep Blue Church

scribblingtheology2 Comments

The Sun glistens off the ocean’s face illuminating its grandeur, giving awe to all who brave its windswept shores.


The Sun’s light dances across the surface of the ocean then trickles below the surface to bring life to her many congregants.


Upon the ocean’s surface, fishermen are compelled by her mysterious call as they throw their lines, nets, and rape her womb.

Captains sail the great unknown with their sacred cargo while oil seeps out into the very waters that give them purpose.


Intrepid explorers go from island to island excited to discover new land, but turn their cannons and flintlocks on anything that seems other.

The ocean, full of schools of fish delightfully darting to and fro as they seek warm water and feast upon their daily sacraments, unaware that fraternities of predators lurk in the deep.


The nearly extinct and wounded drift through her halls seeking shelter from that which seeks to harm them, without realising – or perhaps without a choice – that danger is behind every pillar.


Hope. The light still trickles down to those that dare swim.


Warmth flows from the cracks in the ocean’s floor life to even the darkest rooms.


She will be cleansed, renewed, and delighted in once again.

Learning to Love Life

scribblingtheologyLeave a comment

Quite a lot of my posts are about suffering and pain, and for a good reason. Life is full of suffering, it is inescapable, and we all need to be continuously reminded that suffering is one of the primary ways in which God uses to grow you and transform you into something genuinely human – Jesus Christ. However, I can get bogged down in the tragedy of life a bit too much. It’s easy to be overcome by it and to always be suffering in unnecessary ways. Some of the pain and suffering we experience can be brought upon ourselves. To combat the unnecessary suffering we can create, I think we need to learn to love and appreciate the beautiful parts of life God has given us. Paul says, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honourable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things” (Philip 4:8).

Paul experienced a lot of suffering (2 Cor 11:25), yet remarkably it seems to me that he didn’t lose perspective of the bigger picture. Remember, Paul was a first-century Pharisee that loved Jesus. He knew his Bible very well. So he would’ve known that the world was created for humanity to flourish in, rule over, and enjoy (Gen 1-2). Paul was fully aware that God’s good world was given to humanity as a gift to responsibly indulge in as opposed to being taken advantage of for a profit and gain. Paul knows that man and woman were made for each other, to enjoy one another, to love and to multiply rather than to abuse and use. Every bird and beast, every tree and shrub, every stream and beachside, every fig and pear (except apples), every person was made good for us to partake of, enjoy and love. Paul knew that despite our fallen and broken condition (Gen 3) God still wants this. Paul knows that his God has a plan to restore the entire created order to the state in which once again, humanity can be at one with the world and one another (Rom 8:22-24). So for Paul, every time he caught a glimpse of this anticipated hope, every time he saw people loving one another as themselves, every time he saw the God of Israel among His people the Church he would consider it lovey and excellent and worth meditating upon. God wants humans to enjoy the world they’ve been given. Suffering might be unavoidable, but so is the beauty of life, and there is a lot of it. You just need to do a bit of looking.

For me, learning to love life starts in three places:

  1. Understanding, appreciating, and experiencing the majesty of God in Christ: Nothing moves me more, makes me tear up more, causes me to tremble more than the love of God in Christ. Admittedly, there are days and even seasons of my life where the Gospel and God can become quite dull or old hat. It is in those seasons I need to work through the hardness of my own heart, and the darkness blanketing it. However, when I move past my flesh, and I remember the stark truths of the Gospel, that’s where my motivation for flourishing, for loving others and to embrace God’s good gifts comes from.
  2. Seeing the beauty in your family and loving them fiercely as a result: For the men, there is no greater task (if God has given you the gift) to love your wife as Christ does the Church and to father your kids in the ways of the Lord (Eph 5). Nothing screams godly more than a man who takes family seriously to the point of willing to die for it. A beautiful life starts in the family.
  3. Being moved by the beauty and magnificence of friendship – loving others as yourself. Friendship – real friendship – is more than a simple catch up with your mates. Real friendship is laying your body upon the altar of sacrifice for the sake of the other. It is weeping when they weep, it is laughing when they laugh, it is bearing their burdens so that they too may enjoy the beauty God has to offer. Real friendship in Christ facilities human flourishing on a level that the world cannot hope to experience in and of themselves.

Dear friend, you suffer, you hurt, I know these things. I experience them almost on the daily. While we all experience these things, there is hope. Jesus Christ, our Lord, has defeated satan, sin, and death. Already you can taste and see that the Lord is good and that life is to be enjoyed not just suffered through. Don’t lose perspective of the bigger picture. Hold fast to the hope we have in Christ. Be in awe of His greatness. Love your family and friends well and just go to the beach, or the mountains or down to the park and have a good drink and food and give thanks to the Lord. You’ll be better for it.